Posts made in February, 2017

Never say at a job interview

Here’s an example of something you never say at a job interview: ‘Can I have my resume back? It’s my only copy.’ Silly jokes...

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Who is this?

The wife of a politician goes in for her annual gynecological exam, and the doctor tells her she’s pregnant. She storms out of the office and calls her husband. “You got me pregnant! How could you be so careless?” After a moment of stunned silence, he replies, “Who is this?” Dad jokes...

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Clothing sizes are weird

Clothing sizes are weird, they go: small, medium, large and then extra large, extra extra large, extra extra extra large. Something happened at large, they just gave up. They were like, ‘I’m not doing any more adjectives; you just keep putting extras on there.’ Fat jokes...

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Drinking together

Two guys are drinking together, when one of them throws up all over himself. “Christ!” he says, “My wife is going to kill me.” His friend puts his arm around his shoulder and offers him 20 dollars. “Don’t worry,” he says, “I’m your best friend – give her this and tell her that I chucked up on your jacket, and that I gave you this money to get it cleaned.” “Fantastic,”...

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I like to judge

I like to judge. I’m a judger. I hate when people say, ‘Hey don’t judge.’ ‘Cause I think, ‘You don’t take away my hobbies.’ Lawyer jokes...

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