Dirty

69

What’s 69 plus 69? Dinner for 4. Dirty jokes...

Read More

Not the queen, the king

Once upon a time, there was a king who thought that his officers were going to try to have sex with his queen. So he made all of his officers put on tight pants and told them that if anyone got a boner their head would be chopped off. So he lined them up and the queen came to the first one and took off her gown. He got a boner, so that was the end of him. Then she came to the next one and took off her gown, he got a boner and that was the end...

Read More

Remember turning 21?

Remember turning 21? It all happens all at once – boom – legal to drink beer, illegal to sleep with 16-year-old girls. Really threw me, actually. It’s not fair. They give you something good, and then they take something better away. Marc Price Pirate jokes...

Read More

Lying in bed in a hospital with an oxygen mask over his mouth

A man is lying in bed in a hospital with an oxygen mask over his mouth. A young nurse appears to sponge his face and hands. “Nurse,” he mumbles from behind the mask, “Are my testicles black?” Embarrassed the young nurse replies, “I don’t know, I”m only here to wash your face and hands.” He struggles again to ask, “Nurse, Are my testicles black?” Again the nurse replies, “I...

Read More

A guy wakes up one morning with a hangover

A guy wakes up one morning with a hangover. “Honey, I know I made a fool out of myself at the party last night, so tell me what I did.” “You got in an argument with your boss.” “Well, piss on him!!!” said the man. “You did. He fired you.” “Well, screw him!” “I did.” said his wife. “You’re back to work on Monday.” Corny jokes...

Read More

A buffet

Once upon a time there was a 98-year old woman whose billionaire husband died. The woman had inherited all of her deceased husband’s fortune and decided she would see if she could remarry herself a fine young man. So, she walked into a bar and announced to all the men that she had inherited billions of dollars and would marry the guy with the biggest d**k. Now of course this woman wasn’t all that in the looks department, as a matter...

Read More

Grosser than gross

What’s grosser than gross? When you throw your underwear and it sticks to the wall. What’s grosser than that? When you come back an hour later and it’s moved up three feet. Dirty jokes...

Read More

Do I have to stick my head in the fence?

An Aggie and a Longhorn had just bought a ranch together, so they were driving the fence line to check everything out when they came upon a goat with his head stuck in a fence. So the Longhorn gets out of the truck, looks around, and then starts screwing the goat. He gets finished, takes a step back, ands asks the Aggie, “Hey, you want a piece of this?” The Aggie says, “Yeah, but do I have to stick my head in the fence?” Pirate jokes...

Read More